FMA: Five Ed/Russell Drabbles

[lynx212]

Five Drabbles in one post

Fandom: FMA
Rating: PG13.
Pairing: Ed/Russel
Words: 500
Warnings: Post Character death allusions to suicide.
Spoilers: Possible movie spoilers
A/N: Written for 5_prompts  and fandomwords100  and a big thanks to vexed_wench  for the beta love ya babe HUGS

1

I thought we would grow old together you know that? The six years we had were wonderful. Every perk, every pitfall was blissful in a way I can’t put into words nor do I ever hope to obtain again. It’s hard to believe a careless driver took you away from me.

I enter the room that was your study, not one item has been moved since you walked down the street to get more bread for the lunch we never got to have. Sunlight reflects off the silver watch sitting on your desk and I can almost hear you laughing.

2

It’s been two hundred and twelve days or five thousand and eighty-eight hours I’ve lived without you. Fletcher is worried about me, Al is worried about me even Roy is worried about me. I don’t mean to worry them but I just can’t wrap my mind around the fact that you are gone forever.

I roll over each morning expecting to see blond hair spilled across the pillow. I can still hear the echo of your mismatched footsteps coming down the hall. I’d never tell them but I don’t want to be here without you.

It’ll be my little secret.

3

Everyone keeps telling me to just take it one-step at a time and eventually I’ll move forward and past this. I don’t have the heart to tell them that I no longer have that desire. I don’t want to go anywhere, I want you back by my side and if that can’t happen well…

I do worry about leaving them behind but they can all get along without me in a way I can’t seem to get along without you, but I’m tired of keeping up this façade of being okay for everyone.

I want this mask off for good.


4

There’s a downside to knowing nothing but intelligent people. When you are planning something like this you had better be slick about it. Call what I’m doing selfish, but I know this has to be done. It’s unfair to ask me to exist in this kind of anguish.

I never thought it would hurt more to live than to die.

I’ve worked this all out and even if they do figure me out by the time they narrow down the possible locations it'll be too late.

But in truth it was too late to save me the moment you passed away.

5

As I move through the forest toward my destination, I imagine Fletcher has arrived at the house for his nightly check in on me and discovered the letter I left. I wanted to disappear, but I couldn’t leave him never knowing what happened to me. It wouldn’t be fair.

As the building comes into sight, I can picture the stir Fletcher has kicked off. He never could handle anything morbid well.

However, as I ascend the winding staircase of the old abandoned church by the river I feel free.

I know seeing you again, is only a few steps away.

 

Comments

[ca11iope.livejournal.com]

Tears make my eyes itch. :(

[baroqueangel.livejournal.com]

Russ, no!!!! I never thought I'd feel for Russell but right now I just want to hug him and tell him it'll all be okay <33

Love these little drabbles dear <3333

[kattrip033.livejournal.com]

*sniffles* Very nicely done.

[sparkyqueen.livejournal.com]

:O

i don't even....

my god this is beautiful, in a sick morbid way

[valiancourt.livejournal.com]

Amazing, beautiful and so distrurbingly true

[hpfangirl71.livejournal.com]

That was beautifully tragic dear... I still loved reading it even tho it was sad!! :(

[kiramaru7.livejournal.com]

That was so sad... T.T