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Entry tags:
Fullmetal Alchemist || Roy/Ed/Russell || 963 Kolme Boulevard
Title: 963 Kolme Boulevard
Fandom: Fullmetal Alchemist
Verse: My OT3
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
lynx212
Chars/Pairs: Roy/Ed/Russell
Genres: Slice of Life
Rating: R (to be safe)
Warnings: Lynx being Lynx... again
Word Count: 4,947
Summary: A little back story on how my favorite trio came to own their current home.
With Russell making the decision to go to medical school it was decided that some of the excess room downstairs be modified so that a section of it could be made into a private study. It would be a place where Russell could leave his notes, books or whatever else he may be using without having to worry about it. I was proud of Russell and admired his resolve. I know it had to take real balls for him to step out of his alchemical comfort zone and delve into something new. I don’t even know if it’s something I could do myself.
As I took measurements of the unused downstairs areas I ignored the soft chuckling behind me and let my mind flash back to how we’d all come to own the house.
Manny.
As in our pet gecko.
Yes Manny was indirectly responsible for the three of us taking the plunge and buying our much loved abode at 963 Kolme Boulevard. The wounded scaly creature had been found by the Elric brothers during a walk in the park. Even though Al had a bleeding heart for all animals he felt the reptile would be in mortal danger in his care considering he had several territorial cats. Ed had brought the thing back to the apartment we all shared, nursed it back to health and kept it.
Without realizing it I had become attached to the creature too and before we knew it we had a pet.
Unfortunately, Russell didn't seem to feel the same amount of attachment. To him it wasn’t acceptable like a dog, cat or maybe even a bird or fish would be. No, much to Russell’s dismay, we had come to possess some sort of lizard like thing that Ed often carted around in his shirt pocket like an ink pen. I could tell that Russell was hoping I’d be livid over Ed keeping the thing but when I too seemed entranced by the scaly little creature things came to a head.
I’ll never forget it. It was an early fall Saturday that Russell had spent watching Ed and I play with the little guy. From his very first comment I knew it wasn’t going to be a pleasant day.
“From the way you two are fussing over it one would think it would at least be cute in some manner.”
“But he is cute, Russ,” Ed replied as he watched Manny squirm around in his pocket.
“Only if you consider cold, green and scaly cute.”
Ed stood up and the little green creature crawled out of his pocket and settled on his shoulder. When he walked over and asked Russell if he wanted to hold him the look Ed got in response was answer enough because his eyes went wide before he shouted, “Be careful Roy, its Russell’s time of the month again, he’s snippy.”
“That is not my issue, Elric!”
“Well something’s crawled up your ass beside me or Roy. What is your issue with Manny anyway? It’s not like he ever bothers you.”
“I just don’t care for salamanders.”
“Well he shouldn’t be a problem since he’s a gecko.”
“Same difference!”
“Ok if that’s so then that makes banana peppers and chili peppers the same since they look similar right?”
I merely kept my head behind my newspaper I was trying to read. I knew where this was going. That comment by Ed was checkmate and Russell was going to be furious.
“Just. Get. Rid. Of. It.”
Ed stared at Russell for a few moments, “No.”
“I’m not sharing a dwelling with that thing!”
“Tell me what’s got you so bent out of shape and maybe I’ll consider it but as of right now you just having your panties in a wad over it isn’t reason enough!”
“Fine commentary from a man that goes commando most of the time.”
“Funny it took you over a year to complain about it.”
“You know what Ed. I get sick and tired of your attitude some days.”
“If that’s the case then…” Ed began but stopped, narrowed his eyes at Russell and walked away without a word.
Stunned, Russell just stared at his retreating backside. I even peeked over my paper when Ed stopped mid-sentence. The shock I experienced at seeing my shorter lover walking away propelled me to follow the instant Russell left the living room to go outside. Ed never walked away from an argument, it just wasn’t his style. On some level Ed always enjoyed a good verbal spar, even if it did get a little serious from time to time. Him walking away meant something was wrong.
When I found Ed, he was lying on his stomach on the bed with Manny perched on top of his head. His expression was serious and his automail hand was plucking at nonexistent fuzz balls on the bedspread.
“What’s wrong?”
“Russell’s full of hot air.”
“So are we all at times. What’s your point?”
“No I was being serious. He is more bark than bite. When it comes to protecting someone or standing up for something he truly believes is the right thing he can be just as vicious and bullheaded as you and I…”
“But?”
“But, when it comes to the everyday hum drum of life he doesn’t push for much.”
“What do you suppose we do about that?”
“We buy a house.”
“WE WHAT!?”
“Keep it down will ya?”
“What does that have to do with what just happened and how is that going to fix anything?” I questioned Ed as I sat down on the corner of the bed we all shared. I was honestly confused.
“He already feels like an intruder for some reason and we’ve gone through that but it’s totally not gone in his mind. I don’t think he’s ever come to believe he’s just as important to you and I as we are to each other.”
“I was afraid of that. I should have never told him I’d been attracted to you for so long,” I sighed out wishing more than anything that I could retract things said in a long ago conversation that has a tendency to haunt me when I least expect it.
“Don’t beat yourself up over that. This is more his insecurity at play than anything either of us have done or said. I approached you both at the same time for a reason. I love you both equally end of story. Regardless, if I thought he’d take me seriously I’d admit to having a crush on him long before I thought of you in that way.”
“I didn’t know that.”
“There wasn’t a need for you to know,” Ed replied as he tugged on Manny’s tail. “I didn’t say anything to him back then because had come to value my friendship with him so much I didn’t want to fuck it up by making it more. I decided it was just a crush that would fade if I allowed it to however before I could put that plan into action you started hanging out with us on a regular basis and… well anyway that’s all…”
“No, finish what you were saying I’ll admit to being curious.”
“I’ll finish it you admit to being nosey.”
“Fine. I’m nosey now spill it.”
“By the time the thee of us were hanging out on a regular basis I was convinced I was the world’s biggest slut.”
“Why?”
“Because I spent the entire time, resisting the urge to touch one of you, undressing you both in my mind or shifting around to hide the boner you both would give me for doing the most random of things.”
“Oh this is getting better by the minute. Name something.”
“Ok fine but not only are you nosey you’re a pervert too.”
“I’ll wear both titles proudly. Now talk.”
“It’s nearly shameful to admit this but for me watching him work shirtless on those plants of his nearly killed me when I could only look and not touch. He would be working with his hands and going on about some fertilizer compound and I wouldn’t hear a damn word he said because I’d be lost watching his lips move and daydreaming.”
“I would have to agree with you on that. What about me?”
“Not on your life, if your head gets any bigger it’ll pop.”
“Fair enough,” I said before changing the subject. “Back to the here and now, do you have any clue what’s truly behind him feeling this way?”
“Nothing concrete, just some observations I've made about him in the past.”
“Like?”
“Well he’s about as headstrong and mouthy as they come but he still feels like he owes me for helping him fix some mess he got into when he was using my name way back when we first met. To be honest I don’t think he believes me when I say I don’t even think about that shit anymore.”
“I can understand him having a hard time swallowing that. Try to put yourself in his shoes.”
“I have,” Ed said as he rolled over onto his back and I had to fight not to laugh as I watched Manny desperately scrambling to stay out of harm’s way. “But if I was concerned about that would the three of us be in our current situation? Do I strike you as the type of person that would let someone I had issues with be as close to me as Russell is?”
“No, you don’t.”
“Thank you, but between that and the fact that you and I both have really strong personalities I think what makes Russell, Russell gets lost in the mix at times.”
“You really think so? When I think of someone too skittish to express their opinion, I don’t think of Russell.”
“But that’s only him in a general sense. When it comes to the little things that really make up life I think we’ve run him over without realizing it.”
“How so?”
“What did we eat last night?” Ed asked as he ran a finger over Manny’s scaled head.
“What does that have to do with…”
“Just answer the damned question.”
“We had Mahi, asparagus and rolls.”
“Whose idea of a good meal is that?”
“Mine I suppose, so?”
“So what did we have the night before?”
“Beef, gravy and spicy noodles, a favorite of yours I believe.”
“Correct now the night before that?”
“Where is this leading Ed? It’s September it’ll take days to get back to January.”
“Now tell me the last time we had something that was Russell’s favorite?”
“I think I see your point now,” I sighed as I kicked off my shoes and reclined beside Ed.
“Also look at our environment it screams Roy and Ed but not all three of us. You love where we live because you are a pampered little city boy.”
“I’ll try not to be offended by that.”
“Well it’s the truth even if you are offended. Me, even though I grew up in the countryside I really don’t care where I live long as I can tolerate the people around me and I get to eat.”
“Yes, you are lovably simple in that sense.”
“But I am not so sure Russ feels the same way. He loves the outdoors, adores all plant life obviously, yet here we are in nearly the heart of the city. No space for him to really do his thing.”
“What does this have to do with, Manny?”
“Everything, yet nothing. I think Manny was just another decision we made that Russell felt left out of and it doesn't help that both of us dote on the little guy because we like him. We didn't ask, we just assumed him being here would be okay. I think it rubbed Blondie the wrong way so he’s taking it out on scaly butt here,” Ed finished as he pointed to the creature that was lying contently on his stomach.
“So the fix is a house in the rural reaches of wherever?”
“No, then you would be miserable and I’d have to deal with this in reverse. I was thinking more like the suburbs of the city. Maybe a place sitting on at least an acre of decent land or maybe a spot that had an empty lot beside it also for sale or something… not sure yet, we’ll have to look.”
“You did a lot of thinking in a few minutes.”
“Comes along with the genius territory, my mind can go from Alpha to Omega fairly quickly if I let it.”
“When do you want to start looking?”
“Since it’s not even noon yet I’m going to start today. You stay here and see if you can get him to be a little less hostile. If he keeps being this snippy I may choke him yet.”
“You’re all heart, Ed.”
“I know but you wouldn't have me any other way.”
Ed left that day and didn't return until nearly dinner time. He brought with him a lemon meringue pie and even though Russell was still a little peeved he didn’t complain anymore about, Manny.
Weeks passed by of Ed and I searching before Ed strutted into my private office wearing a grin a mile wide.
“I take it you've possibly found something?”
“No I’ve found the something, no doubt about it. I’m so convinced this is perfect I’m willing to bet you a week’s worth of dish duty.”
Ed never lost a dish duty bet so I was excited to see this place he was so hyped up about. Telling Riza I might be gone a little longer than an hour for lunch I was all set to leave until she gave me a look. Remembering the last time I’d said that I flushed a little as Ed fought not to laugh out loud. He was off for the day… I was not and Riza didn’t look amused.
“I promise my intentions are respectable this time, Hawkeye. Scouts honor,” Ed said as he gave her a wide, golden eyed, innocent look from his position beside me.
“I’m holding you, as well as that spurious look, to that Edward.”
+++
When we finally pulled into the driveway of the house I thought, so far so good. The outside of the place was not only passable it was nearly grand in appearance. If I had to pick a word for it I would have chosen stately. It definitely wasn’t the barn style abode I was picturing on the drive over. As we walked up the driveway Ed pulled out a brass key on a ring and twirled it around his finger. He unlocked the door and the sight that greeted me was awe inspiring indeed. Vaulted ceilings, hardwood floors and an abundant amount of natural light due to having more windows than I had ever seen in a house.
Everything looked to be newly remodeled, from the freshly painted walls and polished floors to the new appliances and windows. As I looked around at everything Ed followed me silently, not saying anything just letting me take in my surroundings. Once we reached the outside I saw why Ed was convinced this was the place. Not only was the level land that came with the house perfect it also had a sizeable greenhouse in the back yard along with what looked like a decent sized hedge maze and a pond.
I turned around and found myself face to face with a smirking Ed, “Okay Ed, what’s the hitch? Bad plumbing? Well issues maybe or a leaky roof?”
“Nope, nothing like that, this place is as fit as a fiddle.”
“Ok then how far out of our price range is it?”
“It’s not and actually for what we’re getting its dirt cheap.”
I arched an eyebrow at him that only went up further when Ed gave me the list price, “How can they sell a place like this for so little?”
“It’s haunted,” Ed replied.
“Funny Ed, real funny, the price just makes me think there’s something we don’t know.”
Ed merely shrugged his shoulders as he looked in a greenhouse window. He didn't seem overly concerned with the situation but that wasn’t something that was a comfort to me. Ed didn’t bother concerning himself with many things of this nature so him appearing nonchalant wasn’t anything new.
“Fine, let me talk to the realtor and we’ll see about buying it.”
“That’s already taken care of.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean I’ve already taken care of that. They are drawing up the contract already.”
“YOU WHAT!”
“Hey I told you I was certain and you would be too… was I wrong?”
“No but…”
“If there is no issue there need not be a ‘but’. So smile already, the three of us are about to become homeowners.”
I sighed but couldn’t keep the grin off my face. I’d never given home ownership much thought but over the last few weeks I decided I liked the idea a little more each time I thought about it.
“Now we just have to see if Russell likes it but I don’t think that will be a problem. I wanted to surprise him but realized us buying it without him might just add to the problem.”
“You may be right there, Ed. So when do we bring him by?”
“Tomorrow, right after we take him to that fancy restaurant he likes so much.”
“You hate that place.”
“Yup, I do, but you know me I can find something to eat on any menu. The things I do for the two of you…” Ed sighed out as he rolled his eyes and walked back towards the house.
I was following him when something made me spin on my heels and face the hedge maze.
“Something wrong?” Ed asked.
“No… at least I don’t think so.”
“Good,” Ed replied as he marched back in the house.
I stared out toward the maze for a moment longer before I followed him.
+++
Dinner was a success Russell ordered Beef Bourguignon, Ed ordered Cotes de Veau au Fromage and I decided on Boudin Noir. Ed was happy with his veal and not complaining so that made the entire affair more enjoyable than anything else could have. Russell was still fairly quiet and it was irking me to no end. He was never quite. Just like Ed was never full and I was never not horny. Either way I had, had all of the silence I could take.
“So how were things at EcoSpec today, Russell?”
“Good, nothing to write home about.”
“Any new discoveries?”
“Nope.”
“Any new projects?”
“No.”
“Well have you…”
“Oh for crying out loud,” Ed cut in, “we can’t stand you being in this funk any longer so tell us how to fix it!”
Russell stared at us for a moment before saying, “I’m sorry guys I didn’t mean to bring you down. I just have a lot on my mind.”
“Then talk to us,” Ed said as he shoved his last bite of veal in his mouth, “We’re all ears.”
Russell’s brow furrowed, “I can’t seem to put it into words just yet.”
“Fair enough but while you’re thinking about it why don’t you order some of that Brûlée stuff you like so much so we can get moving. There’s something we want to show you before it gets dark.”
Russell gave us both a suspicious look but did as requested. Regardless of what followed I guess he figured a decent helping of Crème Brûlée would make anything bearable.
+++
The car ride was somewhat tense due to everyone’s silence. Ed and I didn’t want to blow the surprise and Russell had no idea what to expect. When we pulled up to the house Russell asked us why they were there.
“Are we visiting someone?”
“In a sense,” I replied with a glance in Ed’s direction, wearing a barely suppressed smile.
When we walked in, there was the woman that had shown Ed the house and a man I assumed to be a notary.
“Thank you for doing all of this on such short notice Karen and…” Ed began as he shook the woman’s hand.
“His name is Milton and it was our pleasure Mr. Elric.”
I saw Russell make a face when Karen called Ed, Mr. Elric. He eyed the two closely because no one ever called Ed by his last name. It was something he basically forbid.
“This is Russell Tringham and Roy Mustang,” Ed said as he pushed us both forward to shake hands with Karen and Milton.
“My, my,” Karen said as she eyed the two of us rather blatantly, “You’re a lucky man, Mr. Elric.”
“I like to think so,” Ed replied with a grin that could only be described as wolfish, “We’ll be back after we look around ok?”
“Take your time, we are in no hurry,” Milton chimed in.
As we walked around Russell commented on how absolutely empty the place was. We could tell he still had no idea who Karen and Milton were or what their business with Ed was but he was along for the ride. As we walked from room to room Ed and I kept asking Russell what he thought of certain things. He gave us answers even though his confusion about why it mattered was written all over his face.
When they walked in the master suite Russell was impressed with the size of the room as well as with the fact it had its own private bath.
“It’s big but I would make it even bigger,” Ed said as he smirked at me, “The room on the other side is a bedroom as well and I’d tear the wall down and make this one enormous space.”
Russell merely let Ed rant on as he made his way to the window. One look outside into the dimming light of day and he was out the door and headed down the steps.
“I take it he finally spotted the back yard?” I asked.
“Yeah and it’s about time. I still think we are going to have to spell it out for him. I can tell it hasn’t dawned on him yet.”
“In all fairness Ed we haven’t even so much as discussed something like this before and considering the funk he’s been in I don’t think his mind is thinking about anything in a positive light.”
“I know and I don’t like it. He’s been too damn blue and introverted lately.”
“I agree, but I think this may fix it.”
The older two alchemists followed Russell outside and stood on the porch watching him look around. He was like a kid in a candy store and I felt I had to commend Ed once again on finding the place. It appeared that it may be just what they need to rebalance their lover.
“I can’t believe no one lives here,” Russell exclaimed when he finally returned to the porch.
“Well that may all be about to change,” I replied as I smirked at Ed.
“Yup, I think you might be right, Sparky but that’s only if Blondie is ok with it.”
It took Russell a moment but everything finally caught up to him. He looked from me to Ed and back again several times before he said, “Are you guys serious?”
“Yup.”
“Yes we are.”
“But only if you truly like this place, we kind of did this as a surprise of sorts but if you want to be in on the looking around we could tell Karen and Milton we still…”
“No! Don’t you dare! This place is perfect!”
“Well if you are certain about that,” I said as I tried not to laugh at Russell’s enthusiasm, “then we all have some documents to sign before we draft all of our friends into helping us move.”
An hour later, three very happy alchemists were on their way home with a deed.
By the time they reached the apartment excited talkative Russell was back and all was right with the world. I was in the study reading the newspaper I never finished earlier and having a glass of wine when Ed slipped in and shut the door behind him. I arched an eyebrow at him and sat down the paper.
“What’s going on in that head of yours now?”
“Weeeelll… I know Russ is in happy land right now but you know what would really ice his cake tonight don’t you?”
“No, but I have a feeling you’re about to tell me.”
Then with Ed’s usual lack of social grace he said, “Ask him to fuck you.” No preamble, no warning, just flat out there in Ed’s own uniquely charming way.
“Excuse me?”
Ed sat on the corner of the desk and said, “It’s not something that happens often and I know for a fact he likes it when it does. We’ve established that you and I are both way more aggressive when it comes to asking for what we want, especially in the bedroom. Russ on the other hand just kinda goes with the flow.”
“Not that I mind in the least, but how is it that you are so certain this will, ice his cake, as you put it?”
That devilish smirk Ed was famous for slid over that perfect mouth as he leaned forward and said, “Because he once told me watching your face as he fills you is the hottest thing he’s ever seen and he has to fight not to cum from thrust one.”
The amount of heat that flooded my face in that moment was unreal. I swear Ed missed his true calling when he didn’t decide to go into something much more carnal than alchemy could ever be. I have had people try to talk dirty to me before and it was… okay. Something I could always take or leave, but Ed made you crave it and the best part about it was you never knew when it was coming. Ed would just hit you out of the blue with it and before you could blink; your pants were too tight.
“Well since you put it that way, I’ll see what I can do.”
“Good, I say we sandwich his ass the moment he’s naked. A good blowjob from me oughta get the ball rolling.”
“Without a doubt Ed, without a doubt.”
Ed hopped off the desk, bounced out of the room and just left me staring after him. The vertically challenged blond had no idea just how deliciously wicked he was and it was all me and Russell could do most days not to molest him every chance we got.
As I wrote down the final measurements of the rooms my eyes fell on one of the many water bottles Ed left lying around and I smiled. This reminded him of one of the earlier conversations he’d had with Russell shortly after they had come back from that vacation as lovers and not the “close friends” they had left as.
Ed had breezed into the back of the living room of the apartment shirtless, in a pair of sweatpants and plopped on the floor. He sat his water bottle down just out of reach before he launched into a series of precise movements. Both Russell and I had stopped what we were doing not long after Ed came in to watch.
How could we not?
Ed never spared them a look as he bent, twisted and contorted that flawless little body of his into positions neither of us thought possible. Back bends, lunges, hand stands, you name it, he did it and when Ed got in some position that had his forearms on the floor as he arched his back and ended up with his feet dangling above his head Russell left the room.
By the time he came back in Ed was done but his little routine had left him with a thin sheen of sweat all over his body as well as a bit breathless. He picked up his bottle of water and put the cool container to his forehead then proceeded to move it slowly down his body. Russell looked at me and before I could comment he was off into the kitchen again.
Ed and I soon followed talking about some kind of array as Ed proceeded to make himself a bowl of ice cream. Bite after bite is a slow erotic molestation of the spoon Ed was using. Russell couldn’t take it anymore and went out on the patio.
By the time I finished my conversation with Ed and followed, Russell looked beside himself.
“Are you ok?”
“Yeah, I think so but is it just me or…”
“Or is everything Ed does sexy as hell? No, it’s not just you.”
“How in the hell can you stay so calm?”
“I don’t, I’m just better at hiding it.”
“It took everything I had not to strip him in the middle of the living room and fuck him senseless once his ass ended up over his head… I didn’t know a person could bend like that.”
“Me either but it was a damn good show. But its safe now, he’s in the shower.”
“I’m still hard as stone.”
“We could follow him, you know he never locks the door.”
…and that was precisely what we had done that night.
Those were fond memories for me and now that we are in the midst of making another life altering shift for the three of us I have no doubt that we will make many more.
Fandom: Fullmetal Alchemist
Verse: My OT3
Author:
lynx212Chars/Pairs: Roy/Ed/Russell
Genres: Slice of Life
Rating: R (to be safe)
Warnings: Lynx being Lynx... again
Word Count: 4,947
Summary: A little back story on how my favorite trio came to own their current home.
With Russell making the decision to go to medical school it was decided that some of the excess room downstairs be modified so that a section of it could be made into a private study. It would be a place where Russell could leave his notes, books or whatever else he may be using without having to worry about it. I was proud of Russell and admired his resolve. I know it had to take real balls for him to step out of his alchemical comfort zone and delve into something new. I don’t even know if it’s something I could do myself.
As I took measurements of the unused downstairs areas I ignored the soft chuckling behind me and let my mind flash back to how we’d all come to own the house.
Manny.
As in our pet gecko.
Yes Manny was indirectly responsible for the three of us taking the plunge and buying our much loved abode at 963 Kolme Boulevard. The wounded scaly creature had been found by the Elric brothers during a walk in the park. Even though Al had a bleeding heart for all animals he felt the reptile would be in mortal danger in his care considering he had several territorial cats. Ed had brought the thing back to the apartment we all shared, nursed it back to health and kept it.
Without realizing it I had become attached to the creature too and before we knew it we had a pet.
Unfortunately, Russell didn't seem to feel the same amount of attachment. To him it wasn’t acceptable like a dog, cat or maybe even a bird or fish would be. No, much to Russell’s dismay, we had come to possess some sort of lizard like thing that Ed often carted around in his shirt pocket like an ink pen. I could tell that Russell was hoping I’d be livid over Ed keeping the thing but when I too seemed entranced by the scaly little creature things came to a head.
I’ll never forget it. It was an early fall Saturday that Russell had spent watching Ed and I play with the little guy. From his very first comment I knew it wasn’t going to be a pleasant day.
“From the way you two are fussing over it one would think it would at least be cute in some manner.”
“But he is cute, Russ,” Ed replied as he watched Manny squirm around in his pocket.
“Only if you consider cold, green and scaly cute.”
Ed stood up and the little green creature crawled out of his pocket and settled on his shoulder. When he walked over and asked Russell if he wanted to hold him the look Ed got in response was answer enough because his eyes went wide before he shouted, “Be careful Roy, its Russell’s time of the month again, he’s snippy.”
“That is not my issue, Elric!”
“Well something’s crawled up your ass beside me or Roy. What is your issue with Manny anyway? It’s not like he ever bothers you.”
“I just don’t care for salamanders.”
“Well he shouldn’t be a problem since he’s a gecko.”
“Same difference!”
“Ok if that’s so then that makes banana peppers and chili peppers the same since they look similar right?”
I merely kept my head behind my newspaper I was trying to read. I knew where this was going. That comment by Ed was checkmate and Russell was going to be furious.
“Just. Get. Rid. Of. It.”
Ed stared at Russell for a few moments, “No.”
“I’m not sharing a dwelling with that thing!”
“Tell me what’s got you so bent out of shape and maybe I’ll consider it but as of right now you just having your panties in a wad over it isn’t reason enough!”
“Fine commentary from a man that goes commando most of the time.”
“Funny it took you over a year to complain about it.”
“You know what Ed. I get sick and tired of your attitude some days.”
“If that’s the case then…” Ed began but stopped, narrowed his eyes at Russell and walked away without a word.
Stunned, Russell just stared at his retreating backside. I even peeked over my paper when Ed stopped mid-sentence. The shock I experienced at seeing my shorter lover walking away propelled me to follow the instant Russell left the living room to go outside. Ed never walked away from an argument, it just wasn’t his style. On some level Ed always enjoyed a good verbal spar, even if it did get a little serious from time to time. Him walking away meant something was wrong.
When I found Ed, he was lying on his stomach on the bed with Manny perched on top of his head. His expression was serious and his automail hand was plucking at nonexistent fuzz balls on the bedspread.
“What’s wrong?”
“Russell’s full of hot air.”
“So are we all at times. What’s your point?”
“No I was being serious. He is more bark than bite. When it comes to protecting someone or standing up for something he truly believes is the right thing he can be just as vicious and bullheaded as you and I…”
“But?”
“But, when it comes to the everyday hum drum of life he doesn’t push for much.”
“What do you suppose we do about that?”
“We buy a house.”
“WE WHAT!?”
“Keep it down will ya?”
“What does that have to do with what just happened and how is that going to fix anything?” I questioned Ed as I sat down on the corner of the bed we all shared. I was honestly confused.
“He already feels like an intruder for some reason and we’ve gone through that but it’s totally not gone in his mind. I don’t think he’s ever come to believe he’s just as important to you and I as we are to each other.”
“I was afraid of that. I should have never told him I’d been attracted to you for so long,” I sighed out wishing more than anything that I could retract things said in a long ago conversation that has a tendency to haunt me when I least expect it.
“Don’t beat yourself up over that. This is more his insecurity at play than anything either of us have done or said. I approached you both at the same time for a reason. I love you both equally end of story. Regardless, if I thought he’d take me seriously I’d admit to having a crush on him long before I thought of you in that way.”
“I didn’t know that.”
“There wasn’t a need for you to know,” Ed replied as he tugged on Manny’s tail. “I didn’t say anything to him back then because had come to value my friendship with him so much I didn’t want to fuck it up by making it more. I decided it was just a crush that would fade if I allowed it to however before I could put that plan into action you started hanging out with us on a regular basis and… well anyway that’s all…”
“No, finish what you were saying I’ll admit to being curious.”
“I’ll finish it you admit to being nosey.”
“Fine. I’m nosey now spill it.”
“By the time the thee of us were hanging out on a regular basis I was convinced I was the world’s biggest slut.”
“Why?”
“Because I spent the entire time, resisting the urge to touch one of you, undressing you both in my mind or shifting around to hide the boner you both would give me for doing the most random of things.”
“Oh this is getting better by the minute. Name something.”
“Ok fine but not only are you nosey you’re a pervert too.”
“I’ll wear both titles proudly. Now talk.”
“It’s nearly shameful to admit this but for me watching him work shirtless on those plants of his nearly killed me when I could only look and not touch. He would be working with his hands and going on about some fertilizer compound and I wouldn’t hear a damn word he said because I’d be lost watching his lips move and daydreaming.”
“I would have to agree with you on that. What about me?”
“Not on your life, if your head gets any bigger it’ll pop.”
“Fair enough,” I said before changing the subject. “Back to the here and now, do you have any clue what’s truly behind him feeling this way?”
“Nothing concrete, just some observations I've made about him in the past.”
“Like?”
“Well he’s about as headstrong and mouthy as they come but he still feels like he owes me for helping him fix some mess he got into when he was using my name way back when we first met. To be honest I don’t think he believes me when I say I don’t even think about that shit anymore.”
“I can understand him having a hard time swallowing that. Try to put yourself in his shoes.”
“I have,” Ed said as he rolled over onto his back and I had to fight not to laugh as I watched Manny desperately scrambling to stay out of harm’s way. “But if I was concerned about that would the three of us be in our current situation? Do I strike you as the type of person that would let someone I had issues with be as close to me as Russell is?”
“No, you don’t.”
“Thank you, but between that and the fact that you and I both have really strong personalities I think what makes Russell, Russell gets lost in the mix at times.”
“You really think so? When I think of someone too skittish to express their opinion, I don’t think of Russell.”
“But that’s only him in a general sense. When it comes to the little things that really make up life I think we’ve run him over without realizing it.”
“How so?”
“What did we eat last night?” Ed asked as he ran a finger over Manny’s scaled head.
“What does that have to do with…”
“Just answer the damned question.”
“We had Mahi, asparagus and rolls.”
“Whose idea of a good meal is that?”
“Mine I suppose, so?”
“So what did we have the night before?”
“Beef, gravy and spicy noodles, a favorite of yours I believe.”
“Correct now the night before that?”
“Where is this leading Ed? It’s September it’ll take days to get back to January.”
“Now tell me the last time we had something that was Russell’s favorite?”
“I think I see your point now,” I sighed as I kicked off my shoes and reclined beside Ed.
“Also look at our environment it screams Roy and Ed but not all three of us. You love where we live because you are a pampered little city boy.”
“I’ll try not to be offended by that.”
“Well it’s the truth even if you are offended. Me, even though I grew up in the countryside I really don’t care where I live long as I can tolerate the people around me and I get to eat.”
“Yes, you are lovably simple in that sense.”
“But I am not so sure Russ feels the same way. He loves the outdoors, adores all plant life obviously, yet here we are in nearly the heart of the city. No space for him to really do his thing.”
“What does this have to do with, Manny?”
“Everything, yet nothing. I think Manny was just another decision we made that Russell felt left out of and it doesn't help that both of us dote on the little guy because we like him. We didn't ask, we just assumed him being here would be okay. I think it rubbed Blondie the wrong way so he’s taking it out on scaly butt here,” Ed finished as he pointed to the creature that was lying contently on his stomach.
“So the fix is a house in the rural reaches of wherever?”
“No, then you would be miserable and I’d have to deal with this in reverse. I was thinking more like the suburbs of the city. Maybe a place sitting on at least an acre of decent land or maybe a spot that had an empty lot beside it also for sale or something… not sure yet, we’ll have to look.”
“You did a lot of thinking in a few minutes.”
“Comes along with the genius territory, my mind can go from Alpha to Omega fairly quickly if I let it.”
“When do you want to start looking?”
“Since it’s not even noon yet I’m going to start today. You stay here and see if you can get him to be a little less hostile. If he keeps being this snippy I may choke him yet.”
“You’re all heart, Ed.”
“I know but you wouldn't have me any other way.”
Ed left that day and didn't return until nearly dinner time. He brought with him a lemon meringue pie and even though Russell was still a little peeved he didn’t complain anymore about, Manny.
Weeks passed by of Ed and I searching before Ed strutted into my private office wearing a grin a mile wide.
“I take it you've possibly found something?”
“No I’ve found the something, no doubt about it. I’m so convinced this is perfect I’m willing to bet you a week’s worth of dish duty.”
Ed never lost a dish duty bet so I was excited to see this place he was so hyped up about. Telling Riza I might be gone a little longer than an hour for lunch I was all set to leave until she gave me a look. Remembering the last time I’d said that I flushed a little as Ed fought not to laugh out loud. He was off for the day… I was not and Riza didn’t look amused.
“I promise my intentions are respectable this time, Hawkeye. Scouts honor,” Ed said as he gave her a wide, golden eyed, innocent look from his position beside me.
“I’m holding you, as well as that spurious look, to that Edward.”
+++
When we finally pulled into the driveway of the house I thought, so far so good. The outside of the place was not only passable it was nearly grand in appearance. If I had to pick a word for it I would have chosen stately. It definitely wasn’t the barn style abode I was picturing on the drive over. As we walked up the driveway Ed pulled out a brass key on a ring and twirled it around his finger. He unlocked the door and the sight that greeted me was awe inspiring indeed. Vaulted ceilings, hardwood floors and an abundant amount of natural light due to having more windows than I had ever seen in a house.
Everything looked to be newly remodeled, from the freshly painted walls and polished floors to the new appliances and windows. As I looked around at everything Ed followed me silently, not saying anything just letting me take in my surroundings. Once we reached the outside I saw why Ed was convinced this was the place. Not only was the level land that came with the house perfect it also had a sizeable greenhouse in the back yard along with what looked like a decent sized hedge maze and a pond.
I turned around and found myself face to face with a smirking Ed, “Okay Ed, what’s the hitch? Bad plumbing? Well issues maybe or a leaky roof?”
“Nope, nothing like that, this place is as fit as a fiddle.”
“Ok then how far out of our price range is it?”
“It’s not and actually for what we’re getting its dirt cheap.”
I arched an eyebrow at him that only went up further when Ed gave me the list price, “How can they sell a place like this for so little?”
“It’s haunted,” Ed replied.
“Funny Ed, real funny, the price just makes me think there’s something we don’t know.”
Ed merely shrugged his shoulders as he looked in a greenhouse window. He didn't seem overly concerned with the situation but that wasn’t something that was a comfort to me. Ed didn’t bother concerning himself with many things of this nature so him appearing nonchalant wasn’t anything new.
“Fine, let me talk to the realtor and we’ll see about buying it.”
“That’s already taken care of.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean I’ve already taken care of that. They are drawing up the contract already.”
“YOU WHAT!”
“Hey I told you I was certain and you would be too… was I wrong?”
“No but…”
“If there is no issue there need not be a ‘but’. So smile already, the three of us are about to become homeowners.”
I sighed but couldn’t keep the grin off my face. I’d never given home ownership much thought but over the last few weeks I decided I liked the idea a little more each time I thought about it.
“Now we just have to see if Russell likes it but I don’t think that will be a problem. I wanted to surprise him but realized us buying it without him might just add to the problem.”
“You may be right there, Ed. So when do we bring him by?”
“Tomorrow, right after we take him to that fancy restaurant he likes so much.”
“You hate that place.”
“Yup, I do, but you know me I can find something to eat on any menu. The things I do for the two of you…” Ed sighed out as he rolled his eyes and walked back towards the house.
I was following him when something made me spin on my heels and face the hedge maze.
“Something wrong?” Ed asked.
“No… at least I don’t think so.”
“Good,” Ed replied as he marched back in the house.
I stared out toward the maze for a moment longer before I followed him.
+++
Dinner was a success Russell ordered Beef Bourguignon, Ed ordered Cotes de Veau au Fromage and I decided on Boudin Noir. Ed was happy with his veal and not complaining so that made the entire affair more enjoyable than anything else could have. Russell was still fairly quiet and it was irking me to no end. He was never quite. Just like Ed was never full and I was never not horny. Either way I had, had all of the silence I could take.
“So how were things at EcoSpec today, Russell?”
“Good, nothing to write home about.”
“Any new discoveries?”
“Nope.”
“Any new projects?”
“No.”
“Well have you…”
“Oh for crying out loud,” Ed cut in, “we can’t stand you being in this funk any longer so tell us how to fix it!”
Russell stared at us for a moment before saying, “I’m sorry guys I didn’t mean to bring you down. I just have a lot on my mind.”
“Then talk to us,” Ed said as he shoved his last bite of veal in his mouth, “We’re all ears.”
Russell’s brow furrowed, “I can’t seem to put it into words just yet.”
“Fair enough but while you’re thinking about it why don’t you order some of that Brûlée stuff you like so much so we can get moving. There’s something we want to show you before it gets dark.”
Russell gave us both a suspicious look but did as requested. Regardless of what followed I guess he figured a decent helping of Crème Brûlée would make anything bearable.
+++
The car ride was somewhat tense due to everyone’s silence. Ed and I didn’t want to blow the surprise and Russell had no idea what to expect. When we pulled up to the house Russell asked us why they were there.
“Are we visiting someone?”
“In a sense,” I replied with a glance in Ed’s direction, wearing a barely suppressed smile.
When we walked in, there was the woman that had shown Ed the house and a man I assumed to be a notary.
“Thank you for doing all of this on such short notice Karen and…” Ed began as he shook the woman’s hand.
“His name is Milton and it was our pleasure Mr. Elric.”
I saw Russell make a face when Karen called Ed, Mr. Elric. He eyed the two closely because no one ever called Ed by his last name. It was something he basically forbid.
“This is Russell Tringham and Roy Mustang,” Ed said as he pushed us both forward to shake hands with Karen and Milton.
“My, my,” Karen said as she eyed the two of us rather blatantly, “You’re a lucky man, Mr. Elric.”
“I like to think so,” Ed replied with a grin that could only be described as wolfish, “We’ll be back after we look around ok?”
“Take your time, we are in no hurry,” Milton chimed in.
As we walked around Russell commented on how absolutely empty the place was. We could tell he still had no idea who Karen and Milton were or what their business with Ed was but he was along for the ride. As we walked from room to room Ed and I kept asking Russell what he thought of certain things. He gave us answers even though his confusion about why it mattered was written all over his face.
When they walked in the master suite Russell was impressed with the size of the room as well as with the fact it had its own private bath.
“It’s big but I would make it even bigger,” Ed said as he smirked at me, “The room on the other side is a bedroom as well and I’d tear the wall down and make this one enormous space.”
Russell merely let Ed rant on as he made his way to the window. One look outside into the dimming light of day and he was out the door and headed down the steps.
“I take it he finally spotted the back yard?” I asked.
“Yeah and it’s about time. I still think we are going to have to spell it out for him. I can tell it hasn’t dawned on him yet.”
“In all fairness Ed we haven’t even so much as discussed something like this before and considering the funk he’s been in I don’t think his mind is thinking about anything in a positive light.”
“I know and I don’t like it. He’s been too damn blue and introverted lately.”
“I agree, but I think this may fix it.”
The older two alchemists followed Russell outside and stood on the porch watching him look around. He was like a kid in a candy store and I felt I had to commend Ed once again on finding the place. It appeared that it may be just what they need to rebalance their lover.
“I can’t believe no one lives here,” Russell exclaimed when he finally returned to the porch.
“Well that may all be about to change,” I replied as I smirked at Ed.
“Yup, I think you might be right, Sparky but that’s only if Blondie is ok with it.”
It took Russell a moment but everything finally caught up to him. He looked from me to Ed and back again several times before he said, “Are you guys serious?”
“Yup.”
“Yes we are.”
“But only if you truly like this place, we kind of did this as a surprise of sorts but if you want to be in on the looking around we could tell Karen and Milton we still…”
“No! Don’t you dare! This place is perfect!”
“Well if you are certain about that,” I said as I tried not to laugh at Russell’s enthusiasm, “then we all have some documents to sign before we draft all of our friends into helping us move.”
An hour later, three very happy alchemists were on their way home with a deed.
By the time they reached the apartment excited talkative Russell was back and all was right with the world. I was in the study reading the newspaper I never finished earlier and having a glass of wine when Ed slipped in and shut the door behind him. I arched an eyebrow at him and sat down the paper.
“What’s going on in that head of yours now?”
“Weeeelll… I know Russ is in happy land right now but you know what would really ice his cake tonight don’t you?”
“No, but I have a feeling you’re about to tell me.”
Then with Ed’s usual lack of social grace he said, “Ask him to fuck you.” No preamble, no warning, just flat out there in Ed’s own uniquely charming way.
“Excuse me?”
Ed sat on the corner of the desk and said, “It’s not something that happens often and I know for a fact he likes it when it does. We’ve established that you and I are both way more aggressive when it comes to asking for what we want, especially in the bedroom. Russ on the other hand just kinda goes with the flow.”
“Not that I mind in the least, but how is it that you are so certain this will, ice his cake, as you put it?”
That devilish smirk Ed was famous for slid over that perfect mouth as he leaned forward and said, “Because he once told me watching your face as he fills you is the hottest thing he’s ever seen and he has to fight not to cum from thrust one.”
The amount of heat that flooded my face in that moment was unreal. I swear Ed missed his true calling when he didn’t decide to go into something much more carnal than alchemy could ever be. I have had people try to talk dirty to me before and it was… okay. Something I could always take or leave, but Ed made you crave it and the best part about it was you never knew when it was coming. Ed would just hit you out of the blue with it and before you could blink; your pants were too tight.
“Well since you put it that way, I’ll see what I can do.”
“Good, I say we sandwich his ass the moment he’s naked. A good blowjob from me oughta get the ball rolling.”
“Without a doubt Ed, without a doubt.”
Ed hopped off the desk, bounced out of the room and just left me staring after him. The vertically challenged blond had no idea just how deliciously wicked he was and it was all me and Russell could do most days not to molest him every chance we got.
As I wrote down the final measurements of the rooms my eyes fell on one of the many water bottles Ed left lying around and I smiled. This reminded him of one of the earlier conversations he’d had with Russell shortly after they had come back from that vacation as lovers and not the “close friends” they had left as.
Ed had breezed into the back of the living room of the apartment shirtless, in a pair of sweatpants and plopped on the floor. He sat his water bottle down just out of reach before he launched into a series of precise movements. Both Russell and I had stopped what we were doing not long after Ed came in to watch.
How could we not?
Ed never spared them a look as he bent, twisted and contorted that flawless little body of his into positions neither of us thought possible. Back bends, lunges, hand stands, you name it, he did it and when Ed got in some position that had his forearms on the floor as he arched his back and ended up with his feet dangling above his head Russell left the room.
By the time he came back in Ed was done but his little routine had left him with a thin sheen of sweat all over his body as well as a bit breathless. He picked up his bottle of water and put the cool container to his forehead then proceeded to move it slowly down his body. Russell looked at me and before I could comment he was off into the kitchen again.
Ed and I soon followed talking about some kind of array as Ed proceeded to make himself a bowl of ice cream. Bite after bite is a slow erotic molestation of the spoon Ed was using. Russell couldn’t take it anymore and went out on the patio.
By the time I finished my conversation with Ed and followed, Russell looked beside himself.
“Are you ok?”
“Yeah, I think so but is it just me or…”
“Or is everything Ed does sexy as hell? No, it’s not just you.”
“How in the hell can you stay so calm?”
“I don’t, I’m just better at hiding it.”
“It took everything I had not to strip him in the middle of the living room and fuck him senseless once his ass ended up over his head… I didn’t know a person could bend like that.”
“Me either but it was a damn good show. But its safe now, he’s in the shower.”
“I’m still hard as stone.”
“We could follow him, you know he never locks the door.”
…and that was precisely what we had done that night.
Those were fond memories for me and now that we are in the midst of making another life altering shift for the three of us I have no doubt that we will make many more.